I had a moment yesterday, I didn’t quite understand what was going on but there was a feeling I couldn’t shake. Have you ever encountered a moment where you didn’t know what was wrong but something is bothering you?
I loss my Dad a month before the birth of my son on November 24th Thanksgiving Day in 2011. I later birthed my son December 23, 2011.
I envisioned my Dad being the greatest granddad as he played the role of being the greatest father. Each day he come over to visit he talked on all the things he had planned with his grandchild, which was sports of course.
As I encountered the challenge of being a new mom minus one parent I was devastated. I had no idea how to be a mom nor what parenthood would be like but I made the best of it.
There are moments where grief hits and instantly shifts my mood from happy to sad but yet I still manage to pretend I’m okay when in actuality I’m missing a piece of me that cut the depths of my soul.
In life I learned one thing no matter what happens life still goes on right? Like the bills are still due, you still have to live for you to survive.
I came to realization on last night grief would not hold me captive but instead I would take my power back. I got in my car and took myself for a ride to get a breath of fresh air while mentally telling myself “GIRL BREATHE.”
I then played some music to help cope my mind as music is like therapy to the soul.
“Music has healing power. It has the ability to take people out of themselves for a few hours.” —Elton John
I guess the main question is how do we cope when life reminds us of each loss? You remind life of each win by continuously showing up for you and being grateful no matter the moment.
I found that every time I speak of how I felt at the moment, others would always respond “you’re going to be okay” or “time heals all.” What they don’t understand is there are stages one goes through while grieving.
Five stages of grief are:
- denial
- anger
- bargaining
- depression
- acceptance
I search for the time to heal due to the lingering of hurt but I’ve just come to terms to accept things as they are and embrace how beautiful life is. I choose to live in love, with a clean heart and peaceful mind. Some things we can’t control in life but we can certainly break free from.
My advice while you are grieving is to allow yourself time to grieve. It’s a process, it’s a journey that one must recover from. It’s not easy when the memories won’t fade away. The hardest part is letting go of the idea that they may return.
So how do we break free of grief? We learn to accept it!
Overcoming The Past 